Dr Pepper

Oh my! It is like Brown gold in a bottle! I am so addicted to it! I tell myself everyday, "Today is the last day I will drink this hip and thigh expanding soda." I can't quit it though. Has anyone heard of a rehab for soft drink lovers? If so, I will pack my bags and check myself in!

Saying goodbye

Nothing in my life is more gut wrenching than having to say goodbye to loved ones. Luckily our recent move has landed us smack dab in the center of most of our relatives and friends so saying goodbye doesn't happen as often as it used to. So goodbye Kleenex! Recently though, my niece started going back to her dad's for visitation. For over a year we didn't have to say goodbye or plan family activities around her visitation. I got used to having her with us all the time. Life was good, life was peaceful. My niece and I have had a special bond. She was the first little one I saw come into this world. Oh boy did she make an entrance! From that point on life has been all the sweeter. There is a special place in my heart for that brown eyed girl! It was her that made me want to be a mother. This past weekend she went back to her dad's. I had to say goodbye. It is a court ordered visitation. One that none of us agree with. Let me tell you, when you think America is the land of dreams and freedom of speech, sit back and listen to the stories of women who are going through custody battles with the biological fathers and see just how much freedom we really have. I am quickly learning that our society and judicial system does not care what a child thinks or feels. Their voice does not matter. It is alright for someone to commit a crime but as long as they are a biological parent they have rights to see that child. No matter how much danger that child may be put in. We try to raise our children to be strong and to have a voice. What do you do when the courts say their voice does not matter? How do you explain to a child that no matter how much they fear a person and feel invisible around that person it doesn't matter. They have to listen to the law. A law which is supposed to protect them. The law gets laid down and despite your fears and anguish you can not protect your child. Our judicial system is broken. Too many years of bullS@#! cases have crushed the system. Each case should be unique and treated according to circumstance, but not anymore. I am bitter, I am tired and I am not even the one who is in the fight. For years I have watched my loved ones fight for a normal life. A life with peace and contentment and normalcy. The peace flag had been waived, life seemed to be good but in a moment of anger and rage it all came crashing down. We thought at last no more goodbyes, but he escaped his judgement here on earth and the courts allowed him to be back in her life and now....... we are back to saying goodbye.

Something has to change. Our judicial system is broken. There are children all over this country who have a voice but are not heard. What are we teaching them? How are they going to grow up? This just isn't right.

It's been a long time!

Wow! Have the cob webs been growing on my blog or what? I have been neglecting my blog now for a few weeks. I just simply can't ignore it any longer. My fingers have been anticipating getting back to my page and my loyal readers. While I may not have as many readers as Dooce.com or The Pioneer Woman (yes I am putting a plug in there because I really love their sites) my readers are loyal and have missed me! I don't know what to say except I have been lazy. My kids are out of school for the summer, so my chaotic life has calmed down a bit. I don't have to rush to get kids fed, bathed and in bed. No more school lunches to throw together at the last minute. No more papers to sign or backpacks to clean. OK.... I need to wipe a tear...not! Summer vacation is always a much anticipated time of year for our family. We love the out doors. If it isn't raining outside we are usually basking in the radical rays of the sun! Just last weekend we packed up our family at the last minute threw together some snacks, air mattresses and lawn chairs and headed to the drive in. I will tell you for this 32 year old woman and mother of 4, the drive in is one of the highlights of my life! I had never been to one so I was in for a treat. We had the best time! Where on this planet can you entertain 3 adults and 5 kids for $11.00?!? I didn't really make it to the second movie. I crawled up on the air mattress we had in the back of our truck and crashed out. I will tell you it was just the best time. The drive in is a dying breed that really needs to come back. Life wouldn't be as wonderful with out drive ins!

Stolen Bike

OK when you make the accusation that something of yours has been stolen you probably should be prepared to back it up right? Well not so much in the case of my daughter's missing bike. If you have seen my garage lately it looks as though a bike rally has temporarily taken place in there. Having 4 kids each with a passion for bicycles and a husband that feeds that passion, I have a ton of bikes in my garage. After we found my daughter hiding in a closet, right before we were going to call 911 and fill out our first missing persons report we went door to door again. We had to let everyone know; yes we found our girl, but now we are looking for her bike. We were very disappointed that someone would take it out of our front yard. After going from door to door and ruling out the high possibility of our daughter leaving it somewhere we pretty much resided ourselves to the fact it was gone forever. Her bike had been the first victim of theft our family has had to deal with in regards to our children's belongings.

Now recently my sister in law has taken a new residence very close to us. The kids have actually been able to ride their bikes to her house on couple of occasions. Our daughter had gone on one of these excursions the day before she crippled her finger doing a cartwheel in the house. Two of her bikes now were residing at my sis in laws house, this of which I had no idea. Now I have like 20 kids 20 pets and a husband or two and well I can't keep up with who's bike is who's and where they are and oh it just makes my head hurt thinking about it! So funny story short, I'm over visiting at my sis in laws last night. Somehow we got on the topic of my daughter's missing bike. Sis in law tells me there is still a bike in her garage. How can that be? My husband and my daughter had gone over a few nights before to pick up her bike. So there is just no possible way her bike is in that garage. I go out to the garage and to my surprise the "Stolen' bike is in the there! Oh my gosh, the night she had gone over there to get her favorite bike she was actually on a pain killer for her poor finger and she picked the wrong bike! Thank goodness the bike went in the back of our pick up truck with her daddy and she didn't ride it home. There is no telling where that little girl would have ended up!! She got a really big laugh at herself and learned a very important lesson as to why you don't quickly accuse people of stealing!!

Panic! Missing Child or maybe not......

This past weekend turned out to be a weekend full of surprises! On Saturday evening my daughter came running into the house screaming her bike had been stolen. I was quick to tell her before we start making such serious accusations we need to be sure the bike just hasn't been misplaced. Shortly after this little dramatic episode it was time for me to put the two year old to bed for the night. Now in the South where we live it is daylight savings time so it is still light outside when the two year old goes to bed. Finally the little booger fell asleep! I went outside to over see the progress our two older boys were making on the garage clean up. Hubby told me I needed to get our daughter to help out with this huge task. The last I saw of her, she had stormed off into her room spouting off how she was going to find the person who stole her bike and get even. Poor thing... well she wasn't in her room. I sent my 8 year old down to my neighbor's house. If she can't be found she is usually over there. Well we were told that the girls went on a bike ride but that was impossible because her bike was "Stolen" and her friend's bike was in my yard. So I had to make the dreaded phone call to my neighbor and let her know the girls were MIA. She came right out and between her, myself and my husband we covered some territory quick. Before the search went out doors I screamed in my house for both of them, but no answer. We went door to door and no one had seen them. I jumped in the truck and drove around the surrounding neighborhoods with my head hanging out the window yelling for the girls. I can't imagine how ridiculous and possessed I must have looked. So many crazy thoughts were running through my head! When I returned back to the house I saw my daughter's friend walking across our yard with her mother. Do you know where those girls where? Hiding in my 8 year old's closet from my 8 year old! They wanted to jump out and scare him! They didn't hear my frantic screams because the washer and dryer were running! Good grief! I am now searching the Internet for affordable home tracking devices!

Really glad this week is over!

So many little things happened this week which I think put me in the running for, "Mom of the Year" NOT! As I sit back in my over sized chair, take in a deep breath and ponder the thought of how nice a big glass of red wine would be at this moment I realize hey, it's Friday and I survived and so did my kids! I missed my 6 year old's first performance of his school career, my 2 year old unfastened the seat belt which holds in his car seat and flipped forward as I was driving down hwy 412. I forgot to send my 9 year old to school with sunscreen on her field day so she got burnt to a crisp and missed her Merit trip to the city pool the next day.
Being a mom is a dadgum hard job! I think instead of deciding on Obama or Clinton, I will vote for whoever will pay us moms to do the jobs that we do everyday, day in and day out and for the most part do it with a half smile on our faces! OK I have done my cyber venting for the night. My daughter is waiting for me to rearrange her bedroom. Boy did I make some deals with her today as she called me 50 times during the day sobbing to me. I was the worst mom in the world today. How dare I not let her go swimming with sun blisters on her ears. Oh the nerve of me! Just can't wait for these little punks to become teenagers! I shiver at the stories I will have then!

By the way I will be writing about why you should never do cartwheels in the house in the next day or so so stay tuned!!

Having a Monday on a Tuesday

The Tuesday after Memorial day is just like a Monday. It is for me every year. This year I thought it would be easier because we didn't do our usual Memorial Weekend camp out. This year all of us opted to stay indoors due to fighting the torrential down pours of last Memorial weekend. What was so different about this year? I am working out of the home so 5:45 came very early for me this morning. Things went pretty smooth for me until I got to Landon's daycare. As I was saying goodbye and prying him off my leg, I somehow managed to wrap my leg around a highchair and trip myself. I fell towards the door and almost smashed into an incoming parent. I was mortified. I laughed it off and did my best to maintain my composure. Good grief! I giggled a bit on my way to the car, rolled my eyes and gave a big sigh. Oh Lord what is today going to be like.....

I worked just half a day today. I had requested time off so I could go to my 6 year old's end of the year talent show. The letter I received at home said the program would start at 1:30. I planned ahead and gave myself plenty of time to make the commute back home. On my way home I called the school. I was unaware of where the actual performance would be held. We are new to this school so I am pretty unfamiliar with the surroundings. Each of my children go to a different Elementary. When I got in touch with someone they said his class had their show at 9:30 am! Ugh! I have missed so much since I started working. I was so excited to make it to his performance. Utter devastation filled my body. I went home, had a good cry and took a fantastic nap! My 6 year old came home none the wiser about me missing his show. He said it was really boring and he didn't mind that I had missed it. I know it was anything but boring. I really hope he was alright. I am still carrying a heavy heart. Kindergarten is almost over for him. Guess today's balancing act didn't pan out. I really need to get better at this.

What happened to me?

This morning on my drive into work, my two year old decided that today he would take the opportunity to throw the worlds biggest fit. OK, yes I know it isn't a "decision" two year olds' are manic and they can loose all since of reason with a flip of a switch. His fit lasted 30 minutes. We did have a really nice 5 minutes together before I had to leave him with his teacher at daycare.
As he is having his melt down I am thinking to myself why, what did I do wrong? Why haven't I learned after the 3 previous to him to turn on that two year old selective hearing? Why haven't I learned by now to take control of these situations and get them under control before it gets to this point? I should be a pro at this by now. After 4 kids this two year old should be ready for military school, right? Maybe I am tired, have I given up? Have I finally teetered over to that side of insanity and this is the repercussion?

Where is my head at!

I went shopping today at Target and get all the way out to the car, almost in the car and relize that I have carried out the Target basket with me! How embarassing! Life is so different these days for me that I just don't know where my head is. Ok here is a little secret....before things changed I still didn't know where my head was!

Multi uses for puppy piddle pads

Tonight I took my two year old, 6 year old and 9 year old over to grandpa's house. It was the spur of the moment trip. Grandpa lives about 45 minutes away so we had to run out the door to fit this trip into our nightly routine. Yeah I said routine, but if you have read my previous posts routine really doesn't exist right now. Life has been a bit hectic since desperate momma has gone back to work. Routine has gone right out that window. So tonight when I decided to load up three out of my four children and run to grandpa's it really didn't matter that I was disrupting the normal flow of our chaotic lives.In haste I completely forgot the diaper bag. What happens when you forget the diaper bag? MURPHY'S LAW happens! We get to my dad's and about 15 minutes into our visit my 9 year old yells,"Mommy he's poopy!" Now for some reason every time we go to grandpa's house my two year old makes a monumental mess out of himself! I guess it is his way of leaving grandpa a lasting present. So here we are out in the country without a diaper in site for miles. Thank goodness for Sophie, grandpa's new Pomeranian puppies' inability to hold herself! He had piddle pads ready to rescue me from a desperate trip to the grocery store! We took that piddle pad and wrapped it around his tiny little bottom and then proceeded to tape him up with packing tape. Nothing was going to get through this diaper! I don't think we have ever laughed so hard! When we returned home my two year old didn't waste anytime showing daddy his, "Puppy Diaper." I just love my two year old!!! I can't wait for him to start dating...oh the stories I am going to have to tell!

Addicted to blogging

I absolutly love this whole blogging idea. The person who thought that one up.....huh! I find myself through out the day thinking of ideas to capture my audience. I actually think it makes me a nicer person, haha! Wonder if my hubby thinks so.

Cat on fire

We have a new addition to our family. His name is Snickers. He is a long haired cat with a huge fluffy beautiful tail. Snickers is the neighborhood stray that has decided to take a permanent place in our home. It's really alright though, because he killed the mouse that had been terrorizing me for weeks! Within 3 days of his arrival he took care of that nasty little rodent. Snickers has a habit of getting on the counter and drinking out of the faucet. He loves running water. He loves it so much he will actually jump into the shower with you so he can catch a sip or few of fresh running water. This past weekend I bought a candle. Without thinking I lit the candle and placed it on the counter next to Snickers favorite watering hole. Not too long after the candle had been it, I started to smell a awful burning odor. It took me a moment to realize that Snickers tail was dangling right over the candle and his tail was just about to go up in smoke! I ran over to him and started to pat out his poor tail. I ran over to the sink and ran some water on it. He now has a big chunk of hair missing in the middle of his tail. Poor Snickers he is none the wiser. All he cared about was drinking out of that faucet! He did stay outside all night, hmmm he might have been a bit upet with me.

Poop

Lovely title huh! Well that is what I was thinking this morning at 6am when I was trying to get ready for work. Usually on a normal morning my two year old sleeps until I am just about ready to walk out the door. I wake him up just early enough to throw some clothes on him, stick a honey bun in his hand and rush both of us out the door. Not today! He woke up soon as my shower was over. I left the water on and put him in. As he played in the water I finished getting ready for work. Right as I was putting the finishing touches on my hair I hear, "Mommy, poop!" I turn around and to my horror the shower is covered in poo! I scrambled to clean the shower and my little boy. I took him out of the shower, wrapped a towel around him and finished cleaning up the shower. As I was finishing the shower I hear again, "Mommy, poop!" He had another blow out all over the tiles and up the door. It is just absolutly amazing how such a tiny little body can cause such complete and utter distruction. So my two year old is now on his third shower in 30 min! I had to clean up the tile, wall and door and the shower again! Note to self mandrin oranges bananas and milk make for not a good combo in two year olds tummies!

P.S. I made it to work on time!

Photos

I need to post some photos! Will get right on that soon as I get my house clean!

Balancing Act

I need to get one! For years it was no problem to keep the house cleaned, have dinner ready by 5, the kids bathed, books read and in bed by 8...ish. Since I have started working out of the home, my house is a pit, dinner is ready by 7, the kids are reading their own books and I am up until 11, packing lunches and setting clothes out for the next day. The laundry is just competely out of control and I am pretty much in a freak out state of mind. No matter how much planning ahead I do, I just can't seem to get caught up. Right now I feel like I am letting my family down as well as myself. I know it is going to take some time to adjust and get a routine. Soon as I walk into the the house I am rushing to get everything finished. Funny because it seems like as I walk in the door hubby hits the couch. So as I am flying through the house making dinner, picking up toys, going through backpacks, signing permission slips and behavior reports, trying to make the two year old happy for a moment and starting dinner, hubby is relaxing away. I love him dearly but hello! SOS!!! I need some help. I deserve a little relaxing time before midnight right? I know I live in the south but hello this aint the 50's!!

The Perfect Laundry

First off, I can't stand laundry! If I had the extra money I would pay someone to do it for me! I can easily spend 12 hours a day doing laundry and there would still be a pile lingering in a kids room waiting to jump out at me and say, "Look what you didn't do!" I think the only thing that drives me to do it, (well other than nudity in public is just completely unacceptable) is the strive for the perfect smell. I haven't been happy with my detergent for a while. I change it like underwear. My poor family just itches their way through my journey in finding that perfect scent. I am open to anyone's advice. I am also accepting donations for one of those front end loading sets hahaha!!!

Why am I desperate?

My husband asked me why I would lable myself as Desperate. . I am desperate to find balance in my life, I'm a Libra so it comes with the territory. I'm desperate to figure out what happened to my sweet, innocent, baby boy that turned into this two year old who has given up his halo and wings for a set of horns! I am desperate to find that Passi Fairy and tell her to take this 2 year old with her until he is completely ready to give up that passie. I am desperate to start having date nights with my hubby again. I am desperate to loose this 20 pounds that I have been hanging onto for the better part of my adult life. I am desperate to pay less than $3 for gas again! I am desperate to find some way to completely finish laundry for 6 people! I am desperate to hear what you have to say! I started this blog to vent, to self reflect and to hear what others have to say about the day in day out drab of the world. Yes, you probably have guess it by now, I am a bit of a freak. I blame it on global warming!

Childcare

Finding reliable childcare in today's world is to say the least a quest.
I think I'd rather pick at a hangnail. I have been on both sides of childcare so I now feel the pain that my perspective parents felt when they were searching for childcare or just forking over the cash to pay for it! Dang it is so expensive! Now the $$ is the least of my concerns of course but it does add a little salt to the wound. My quest for childcare first lead me to a place that was actually highly recommended by our States DHS site. I found it to be dark, smelly and the areas for play to be very limited. Really the deal breaker for me is when the director asked me, "So how old is it?" My quest then lead me to the Internet where I searched facility upon facility. I thought I might try one of those chains that offered the web cam and a brighter newer facility. Upon further investigation I found they had been sited for having a teacher under the influence of an illegal substance.
OK....my options are beginning to dwindle down at this point. I did finally find a great place. My two year old seems to be adapting each day. I can now sneak out of the room without having to have him pried off my leg. My only complaint is he's a little dirty when I pick him up. Should I be complaining? They feed him good food, he takes great naps, his teachers give him lots of affection but his face is dirty!When I ran my daycare that was a huge deal for me. My kiddos never left me dirty! Am I being a freak?

Connie gets a job!

After 9 years of being a stay at home mom I am back out in the work force! I have slowly started to rebuild my bleach stained wardrobe for the more professional bleach free attire. I think my new job is going to help me rebuild my mental frame of mind as well!